I Don't Have the Right Attitude for a Dating Service

A man working on my telephone line told me about a dating service he was using that was free.  Yesterday morning, I decided to look into the service and then on the spur of the moment I decided to sign up. 

Ever since about an hour after signing up I have either been ROFLMAO or wanting to reach for a bucket to puke. 

So far my responses have included:

• A 27 year old.
• A guy whose mentions in his profile that he likes kissing cigarette smokers, is highly sexed, and would be happy to send me private pictures of himself to show me how naturally blessed he is.  He is 49, but enjoys women of all ages. He has even dated an 89 year old.
• One who is an able lover, but only likes fit women. (I was honest in my profile about my shape.) Also what does "able lover" mean when you are 52. Does it mean you can perform without chemical assistance, or that you know what to do with what you have whether you need chemical assistance or not? 

I can't help but laugh when I look at some of the pictures these men post and then their descriptions of themselves.  A little advice, wear a shirt if you have skinny man boobs hanging to  your waist with tufts of gray hair all over your shoulders because you look more like 76 than 56. 

I was honest in my profile and even though my picture was just a head shot, it was recent.  I didn't pretend to be thin, in good shape, or athletic.  I was just me.  

I don't know if I will keep my profile out there or not.  It is all just too weird for me.  I am not even sure when I would go out with someone.  I am pretty happy with my life as it is right now.  I also don't know if I have the guts to go out with a perfect stranger.  I haven't done anything like that since college.  

I keep asking my oldest if he doesn't know a single professor I could date, but he says they are all married or too young.  Maybe when the youngest starts college next fall he will find me someone.