Not as Lost as I Thought

I am not sure how I feel about this year of "finding me" other than maybe I wasn't as lost as I thought I was last year.

If I use 1977, the year I graduated high school, as my starting point, I am still the basically the person.  I pretty much have the same core values and capacity to love as I did when I was 18.

My love and caring for seniors is still there.  I do my best to help others in need.  I can be swept away but my brain brings me back.

Wicked evil jokes still make me laugh out loud, and make me seem cruel, when actuality I am just relating to how cruel the world can be if you pay attention.

I don't mind being alone, but totally enjoy the company of others.  It would be easy for me to be a hermit.

My brain never ever stops thinking about the "what ifs" of my life and others, and some of those "what ifs" can still bring me to my knees in pain.

All in all I am who I am, and I don't see me changing.

I have come to realize more and more though that I don't have to keep people in my life that do not accept me, or make me anxious or unhappy in any way.  Life is too short and I put enough pressure on myself without the pressure of "friends" to change. I have lots of positive people in my life, and I need to stay focused on those relationships.

I am just "me."