Easter Egg Hunt

We just finished with our Easter Egg Hunt. We have always had it Easter morning, but this year the oldest won’t be here for Easter. (Yes, I’m disappointed, but trying to be brave.) I was so surprised the boys still wanted an egg hunt. I thought last year would have been it.

Coloring Easter eggs has always been a tradition in this house. I boil two dozen eggs and then we all sit down and color them. Last year we set a table up next to Raymond’s hospital bed and colored our eggs together in the living room. I can close my eyes now and see him humming and being very artistic and funny. It was a great time, but in my head it was the last time.

The boys did not feel that way. So Friday night we colored 25 boiled eggs (I miscounted when boiling), and put them aside in the fridge for today. We laughed and experimented with the colors. It was fun, just missing one.

The youngest gave me a break this year by saying I only had to hide the boiled eggs. In the past we hid the boiled eggs, plus around 80 or so plastic eggs, most of those filled with candy or pennies, dimes, and nickels. It sometimes took hours to find all the eggs. Today it probably took about 20 minutes to find all the eggs, but I still had to give hints.

We won’t be doing Easter baskets this year because I have already given the boys their Easter gifts. Since my kids have never been into the traditional Easter candy, they have always received books, games, or movies in their baskets. Last week they both came up with books they wanted and were going to buy themselves. I paid for the books and called it their Easter gift. I will probably still have a chocolate bunny for each of them next week.

Since the oldest is not coming home for Easter, we will go to him on Good Friday. We will go order a tux for prom, eat out, and go to a movie. For Easter dinner I will make my mom some chicken and dumplings this year. She has wanted some for a couple of weeks. I really don’t want our usual meal, too emotional for me. Plus, I can box all the up for her to eat later in the week.

Notice I have not mentioned church. The last two times I went to Easter service without Raymond I just couldn’t take it. It is a horrible thing to sit in church and wonder why you can’t be there with one you love. All this resentment starts building up inside me and then the guilt comes pouring on because I am in a place of worship. No it doesn’t work for me right now. I’m not there yet. My pastor understands what I’m saying. I have talked to many widows that feel the same way.

My family and I understand the meaning of Easter. We also understand being together as a family and as one. To me it is all about love and caring for one another. That is what we do everyday, and so Easter will we just stop and think about why that is so important.