I only have sons. One of my best friends only has one child, a son. We worry about our future.
She has a sister and a brother. I only have a brother. We look at how little our brothers do for our parents and we worry. It always falls back on the girls in the family to take care of the parents. Who will take care of us?
I am constantly telling my boys that they must share in the responsibility of taking care of me when I am old. If one lives close to me and the other far away, then the one that lives far away must send money. Of course, I hope that I will always be able to take care of myself, but who knows what will happen in the future. I always thought Raymond and I would take care of each other when we got old.
I have always known that I cannot really count on my brother to be there during the hard times. I am always the one that has to make the big decisions when it comes to my mom. I resent it. Big time. Of course, I've known since I was very young that he wouldn't be there to help me, but I kept dreaming he would grow up and become a responsible adult. Here he is almost 58 years old, and he still hasn't grown up. Sigh.
I pray my sons will marry nice women that will understand if I need one of my boys to come over and help me do something at the house if I cannot afford to hire someone. Of course, I always prayed that my brother would give me a decent sister-in-law that would pitch in and help with mom too. Didn't happen. Didn't happen two times before, and the recent live in has been around 5 years and certainly doesn't do anything to pitch in.
Yes, I do worry about what will happen to me when I am old. I know I have done the best I can in raising my boys to be good, kind-hearted human beings, but who knows what will happen when they get busy with their own lives.
Maybe I better start playing the lottery.
1 comment:
I think we all share some level of what you have expressed with this one. My spouse has a mom left and both my parents are gone. None of them required lots of care prior to their death.
Some times I feel guilty, like I have escaped what lots of folks fear the lingering.
My dad had just gone and I was moving back home to help take care of my mom. I was so looking forward to being able to help her and be there for her, but she died the day I got back to town. At least she knew I was coming back for her...
My sister was there to help in her way but she is more business like and matter of fact in her attitude. It leaves me feeling cold and alone. my parents were both the glue that held my sister and I together.
It's almost like another loss not being able to be close to my sister. I have to say I am confident that my kids would be there for us if we needed the help.
I have the greatest confidence in your situation that your boys would go through fire to help you and be there for you!
Get some rest will you.
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